Showing posts with label 15-20 months. Show all posts
Showing posts with label 15-20 months. Show all posts
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Letting go
I have just expressed the last breast milk for Samuel. I feel the mix of pride and heartache that I now know is exclusive to mothers letting go of their children. I felt it when he was born and his umbilical cord was cut, and I'm feeling it now for the second time, since once again he is no longer dependent on my body for survival. I am sure I will feel it again and again throughout his life as he makes leaps toward independence, each one seeming to arrive too quickly and each one bigger than the last. We're only just getting started.
Saturday, May 14, 2011
Time to Retire
Samuel will be 20 months this Sunday, May 15. It’s time to retire from pumping milk.
When he was two weeks old, I gave up nursing despite never having wanted anything more in my life, thinking formula would be it for us. Then, I had some luck: the pump worked. The first few months were difficult, seven or more sessions a day, literally hours stuck in a chair hooked up to a machine. But it worked, and Sam got breast milk.
Then I got lucky again, in that I was able to donate extra milk to one adopted baby and again to a milk bank for premature and sick babies.
Even better, pumping got easier and I cut back to four, then three times a day, two.
Then, just last month, Sam stared eating some serious solid food. I kept it to one pump for the past few weeks, getting a tiny bit of milk. Sam kept eating, and he sprouted his eye teeth. And last night, he ate a huge plate of food--fish, vegetables, cous cous--just ate like a champ. This is the message I’ve been waiting for.
So, on May 15, I’ll call it quits. My baby is a little boy now, healthy and smart, and I can only take a deep breath and appreciate how lucky I am.
When he was two weeks old, I gave up nursing despite never having wanted anything more in my life, thinking formula would be it for us. Then, I had some luck: the pump worked. The first few months were difficult, seven or more sessions a day, literally hours stuck in a chair hooked up to a machine. But it worked, and Sam got breast milk.
Then I got lucky again, in that I was able to donate extra milk to one adopted baby and again to a milk bank for premature and sick babies.
Even better, pumping got easier and I cut back to four, then three times a day, two.
Then, just last month, Sam stared eating some serious solid food. I kept it to one pump for the past few weeks, getting a tiny bit of milk. Sam kept eating, and he sprouted his eye teeth. And last night, he ate a huge plate of food--fish, vegetables, cous cous--just ate like a champ. This is the message I’ve been waiting for.
Sunday, May 8, 2011
One ounce of milk; Happy Mothers' Day
A few weeks ago, I reduced to one milk pumping session a day and saw a big decrease in supply--down to less than two ounces total. I was a little sad, since I'd hoped to continue at once a day for a little while, but it just didn't seem worth it for so little. But then, of course, I found myself reading about the benefits of even a tiny bit of breast milk per day.
From Kellymom.com: "Even 50 ml of breastmilk per day (or less - there is little research on this) will help to keep your baby healthier than if he received none at all." So, an ounce a day it is, for a little while longer!
A second topic: today is Mothers' day. My guys made today very special for me, and I've been thinking about how each of the people who are "moms" in my life have given me something very special--and how lucky I am to have THREE of these.
From Kellymom.com: "Even 50 ml of breastmilk per day (or less - there is little research on this) will help to keep your baby healthier than if he received none at all." So, an ounce a day it is, for a little while longer!
A second topic: today is Mothers' day. My guys made today very special for me, and I've been thinking about how each of the people who are "moms" in my life have given me something very special--and how lucky I am to have THREE of these.
Sunday, March 27, 2011
Waiting for signs
I received this text from Max, exclusive provider of most of our toddler's meals:
1. carefully select most expensive organic foods 2. cut into tiny pieces 3. pick up tiny pieces off floor 4. throw away
Baby-led feeding naturally leaves me looking for signs of change in Sam's eating habits. But, much like signs of spring this year, they're just not showing up. Sam tries lots of foods but still throws most of it on the floor and drinks milk by the gallon.
Signs of increasing appreciation for solid food would encourage me that it's OK to reduce pumping milk. Absent these, I reduce pumping milk anyway because I'm tired of doing it. The result is that instead of feeling like we're moving forward, I feel like I'm giving up on the effort. Reducing to two pumps a day has decreased my supply to less than 8 oz. a day. We make up the majority with cow milk.
The WHO's "minimum two years of breastfeeding" talks into one ear, while the voices of my many sensible friends and family who think it would be perfectly fine to wean talk into the other. I'm pretty confused right now.
1. carefully select most expensive organic foods 2. cut into tiny pieces 3. pick up tiny pieces off floor 4. throw away
Baby-led feeding naturally leaves me looking for signs of change in Sam's eating habits. But, much like signs of spring this year, they're just not showing up. Sam tries lots of foods but still throws most of it on the floor and drinks milk by the gallon.
Signs of increasing appreciation for solid food would encourage me that it's OK to reduce pumping milk. Absent these, I reduce pumping milk anyway because I'm tired of doing it. The result is that instead of feeling like we're moving forward, I feel like I'm giving up on the effort. Reducing to two pumps a day has decreased my supply to less than 8 oz. a day. We make up the majority with cow milk.
The WHO's "minimum two years of breastfeeding" talks into one ear, while the voices of my many sensible friends and family who think it would be perfectly fine to wean talk into the other. I'm pretty confused right now.
Monday, January 3, 2011
Resolution: Keep going
Most people's new year's resolutions have to do with making some kind of positive change in their lives. My resolution is to keep things the same--to keep pumping breast milk for my 15 month old son. But in other ways, it is like other resolutions, there are strong forces fighting against the thing you are trying to do--otherwise you wouldn't need a resolution to do it! The main force I am dealing with is a constant evaluation of how much Sam needs his milk versus how inconvenient and uncomfortable I am. I often think how wonderful it would be to slip into bed at night without having to sit up for 20 minutes, or to get that extra sleep in the morning, or to quit washing pump parts day after day. Comfort and convenience are strong forces! But I resolve to fight them for awhile longer and keep bottle-feeding breast milk, because Sam still loves and will benefit from breast milk.
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