Breastfeeding is easy!

What!, you ask?  The momma who so struggled to breastfeed that she wrote a tome on the subject and called it "Babyfood" now says breastfeeding is EASY?

Feeding Elliott is easy, now.  He is 7 months old and a total pro.  He loves nursing, is super efficient, and is even learning that turning his head while attached is a no-no.  Once we got past 2 months, and then 3 months, it just became easy.  No bottles, no ice packs, no pump.  Just put the baby in the car and leave the house.

Elliott, 6 months

It makes me feel even more astonished that I exclusively pumped for Sam for 20 months.  20 months!  More than 1 1/2 years of pumping, day in and day out, in the middle of the night while Sam's dad fed him with a bottle, in the middle of the night awake alone, in the middle of the afternoon when everyone was outside playing, at work at my desk, in my car, in bathroom stalls, in hotel rooms, on airplanes, pumping, pumping, pumping.  And never, ever nursing my sweet baby boy.

It makes me feel astonished, and sad, and disappointed in myself I didn't try again, try harder after the initial failures to nurse at 2 weeks, at 3 months.  Disappointed I didn't call every LC in my state to find a way to fix the latch.  Disappointed that I was resigned to being an "EPer."

I know why I was resigned.  Pumping, like driving a moving train, was much easier to keep going with than to stop and reverse directions. And I felt proud that I did the next best thing health-wise.

So now, I will try to leave it behind and enjoy nursing my other sweet baby boy and be thankful I have a chance this time.

What Gerber doesn't want you to know

We never bought a single jar of baby food for Sam.  And given the aggressive marketing by baby food manufacturers (just search for "baby food" and see what comes up), they don't want you to figure this out: you don't need it.

Since the World Heath Organization recommends exclusively breastfeeding for six months, solids need not be introduced until six months at the earliest.  And until one year, breast milk or a substitute is still the biggest source of nutrition for baby.  That means eating solid food under the age of one is just for learning.

What, then, is the point of teaching them to eat mashed "baby food?"  The object of feeding solids initially should be to develop motor skills, teach chewing and swallowing, get a feel for different types of foods, and have fun.  This means we should serve babies soft foods mashable by baby's gums in non-chokable-sized pieces.  You don't even need a food processor or ricer--it's quite easy to do with a fork right at the dinner table off your own plate.  Caregivers can do this easily, or stick to milk during the time the baby is in their care.  An added benefit is that you are in complete control of all ingredients in your baby's solid food. 

Then, by the time baby is one, ideally, he will be well practiced with feeding himself and be accustomed to different flavors and textures, rather than expecting only certain flavors and textures to be delivered all the way to his mouth.

Mechanics of breastfeeding

New ultrasound video (above) shows that infants create a vacuum to suck our the milk rather than pressing or squeezing the milk out.  It also may show why breastfeeding is so painful for some women, like me.  "They're strong suckers," said Donna Geddes, Research Assistant Professor, School of Biomedical, Biomolecular and Chemical Sciences.  Some babies also crunch too hard on the nipple. This information could lead to design of new aids to help new moms with this problem.

Guilt

Many mothers I talk with about baby feeding mention the guilt they felt when they could not, did not, or had to stop breastfeeding. (One or two of my regular readers will say they did not feel guilty, but sadly, they are in the minority.)  It makes sense: most moms understand breast milk is the healthiest choice, so we set our hearts on it, and if it doesn't work, we feel like we've failed our babies.

We are told that "breast is best," but we aren't all able to do what's "best," for reasons I've already talked about--first, the problems that can occur with breastfeeding, and second, the lack of help to solve them.  To me, this is like to telling someone to build a house without providing blueprints, skilled help, or materials. 

Maybe the message "breast is best" is in itself flawed, as this article points out.  It suggests that "breast is normal" might be better.  But for this to be true, breastfeeding would have to become the new norm--and the only way that can happen is through the information and support that will set new moms up for success.  (This article also points out that, interestingly, formula-fed babies, rather than breastfed babies, are the control groups in most studies.)

Meanwhile, we should remind ourselves that none of this is easy, and that a mother's love isn't diminished by what she feeds her baby.

Starting solids

Ever since Sam emerged from the "newborn" phase, people have been asking me when we were going to start feeding him solid food. As with other questions, I turned to books.  Your Baby's First Year Week by Week by Glade B. Curtis, M.D. and Judith Schuler, M.S. suggests starting at 4-5 months, and says that by 6 1/2 months (his age now) babies can enjoy a variety of solid foods. Child of Mine: Feeding with Love and Good Sense by Ellyn Satter recommends basing starting solids on what your child can do (such as sitting up on his own).  Family members suggested starting even earlier by putting cereal in his bottle.

We started offering cereal by spoon at around 5 months. "Cereal" refers to a mashed, cooked, single grain, such as rice, blended with breast milk or formula. We tried making our own, but found boxed baby cereal preferable as it's quick and there's less waste. Some days he seemed to really enjoy it, opening wide for the spoon; others, he just played with the food, or the spoon, or the whole bowl; still others, he cried to get out of his high chair.  It wasn't going great, but we decided to let him go at his own pace.

Then, just last night, Sam's first tooth emerged, peeking out of his bottom gum. I had this thought: wouldn't it make sense that babies are biologically ready for food beyond milk when they grow teeth rather than by some arbitrary time line or unrelated skill development?  I haven't found any research on this so far, but my mommy intuition tells me he'll be more ready for solid food soon.